- @managertools community’s list of recommended business books
- Rory Shiner's little (and overdue) review for @TGC_Au of the @collinhansen edited book Our Secular Age: Ten Years of Reading and Applying Charles Taylor.
- Great sermon on Christian marriage by my older brother
- @TonyJPayne interviews Kara Hartley on Domestic Violence on the @C4CL podcast
- Good public speaking tips, especially for those whose public speaking voice is unnatural.
- You can read a sample of my book online in a PDF viewer here
- Great idea from @citybibleforum ’s Wil Longbottom: do a Google-autocomplete event: Does Jesus…, Is the Bible…
- Free Cru eBook for fostering student leadership.
- Something very Christian in this admiring review of The National's latest album. Nikki and I were blessed to be able to go and see them play at the Sydney Opera House a few weeks ago. 'Consistency is not boring. Consistency is a miracle, a small act of defiance against entropy…. There’s a reason anniversary cards say things like “All these years later, I still love you.”’ It’s because the miracle isn’t in the “love,” it’s in the “still.” The National offer testimony to something we don’t often celebrate: Enduring is a superpower of its own.'
- My seminar on "pushing on when growth is slow" from @genevapush #multiply16
- Gospel Coalition Australia's review of Chris Watkin's Thinking Through Creation
- A great story from a good friend about experiencing mental illness and supporting those who struggle
- @kevindeyoung7 on writing Christians books and getting published
- What's your favourite nickname for the 'commercial at'?
I preached on Proverbs 1–9 at our Uni Fellowship of Christians Pre-Season Conference last week and it got me thinking about the recurring warnings against the adulteress. It’s a major theme in Proverbs and jars against my sensibilities. Why is the woman being blamed for sexual sin? Aren’t men to blame? Aren’t men more to blame?
A couple of thoughts:
Proverbs is a feminine book… so the adulteress fits this theme
Although the main speaker and listener is a father and son: the teaching of Proverbs frames its vision of wisdom around feminine character. Lady Wisdom and Lady Folly are women. The epilogue presents us with the Wife of Noble Character (who is possibly the image of a home and a life built with Lady Wisdom). In this sense, it fits well to cast other characters as women.
That’s not to say that all the characters are women: we meet the drunkard, the sluggard and the mocker and others who are male characters. But it is to say that there is a certain genre logic to a major female characters throughout.
Adultery becomes a vivid case study of all temptation
Within this frame, adultery is not focussed on as if it is the worst sin. Rather, the adulteress is a vivid case study of the nature of all tempation. Ryan O’Dowd writes:
I readily acknowledge that Proverbs is interested in issues of human sexuality. But I’m concerned is that many readers have never understood the larger role of the feminine motif and the way it imbues the whole book with what we might call the eros of human learning—becoming wise means orientating our deepest human desires to a particular way of loving and learning. The man’s sexual impulse serves as a metaphor for learning as a whole.
I think that’s really helpful, don’t you? It encourages me, as the preacher, to also apply much of the extended descriptions and warnings about adultery in Proverbs to other “lusts”:
- of romance and intimacy – but with the wrong person
- the temptation of drunkenness or drugs
- or the delicious pleasure of gossip and meanness
- or the lust for power in the in-group, the Dean’s List, the HD, the student union politics
- greed for money, travel, food, clothes, freedom
- the pride in knowledge, being sophisticated
All of these can be alluring, attractive secretive, seemingly free of consequence… and yet all of them draw us away from godly contentment and into ruin.
Men are responsibly for not accepting the invitation of the adulteress
It is also worth pointing out that the warnings in Proverbs are not written to rebuke would-be adulteresses and prostitutes. Proverbs is a book that often talks about women… but addressing men. Even the Wife of Noble Character is first of all presented to us as one that men should praise and trust in.
And so here, the warnings are for men to not sin by accepting the tempting invitations of the adulteress. Men are the responsible ones for their own desires and sins. They can’t blame their sin on her looks, clothes, scent or wily words. They are responsible. They should avoid her. They should focus their sexual passions in the right place.
And yet at the same time, Proverbs also demonstrates feminine sexual agency… include sinful agency:
Agency, invitation and victimhood
The adulteress has power. The power of sexual desirability and persuasive words. She has the power to harness male sexual desire to her own ends and to their ruin. In this sense is active, full of agency and responsible.
Her agency here is the agency of invitation. And where this invitation is accepted with her consent she is complicit in the sin. Even if there are also larger social structures at work, social structures rarely totally remove our agency and responsibility. They mitigate, but don’t erase our moral culpability. So this is not a case of ‘victim blaming’.
If a man is the initiator and the sexual advance is unwanted (or the extent of the sexual advance is unwanted) then he is to blame. He deserves not only the rebuke of the one who engages in adultery, but also the rebuke of the ‘violent man’. We could go further and recognise that where there is lack of clarity about who is to blame, we must not default to blaming the women — because of her sex, her clothing or anything else.
The risk of unintended invitation (..?!?)
A final issue that Proverbs indirectly rasies for us is a very muddy one… and should not be considered without regular return to the previous paragraph (beginning “If a man…”).
But Proverbs portrays the power of sexual invitation and the various things. Consider for example chapter 7:
6 At the window of my house
I looked down through the lattice.
7 I saw among the simple,
I noticed among the young men,
a youth who had no sense.
8 He was going down the street near her corner,
walking along in the direction of her house
9 at twilight, as the day was fading,
as the dark of night set in.
10 Then out came a woman to meet him,
dressed like a prostitute and with crafty intent.
11 (She is unruly and defiant,
her feet never stay at home;
12 now in the street, now in the squares,
at every corner she lurks.)
13 She took hold of him and kissed him
and with a brazen face she said:
14 “Today I fulfilled my vows,
and I have food from my fellowship offering at home.
15 So I came out to meet you;
I looked for you and have found you!
16 I have covered my bed
with colored linens from Egypt.
17 I have perfumed my bed
with myrrh, aloes and cinnamon.
18 Come, let’s drink deeply of love till morning;
let’s enjoy ourselves with love!
19 My husband is not at home;
he has gone on a long journey.
20 He took his purse filled with money
and will not be home till full moon.”
21 With persuasive words she led him astray;
she seduced him with her smooth talk.
22 All at once he followed her
like an ox going to the slaughter,
like a deer[a] stepping into a noose
23 till an arrow pierces his liver,
like a bird darting into a snare,
little knowing it will cost him his life.
Words, clothes, perfume, food, timing… all of these things are powerful cultural and biological forces which can attract and tempt. They can be deliberately used to draw someone into sin. They can be deliberately used to draw someone in with the promise of sinful pleasure and then to manipulate them in other ways.
And they can be somewhat accidentally used. A woman might foolishly or naïvely send off cultural and biological signals that could be misinterpreted as an invitation. Because these ‘signals’ can have an meaning contrary to the intention of the woman. It is good for us all be aware of this for any number of reasons, including:
- men must be wise and sensitive to the fact that these nonverbal signals can be misunderstood and so not make assumptions,
- women can be more alert to accidentally sending nonverbal signals and so spare somethemlves some misunderstanding.
But of course it remains true that the path of adultery is wrong anyway: whether a man is right or wrong in reading the signals, he shouldn’t go down that path. If a woman is considering deliberately giving an invitation she should not. And of course, if a man wrongly interprets the signals and pursues a perceived invitation against the consent of the woman he is doubly guilt, both for adultery and for violence.
Tricky stuff : keen to hear your thoughts?
I'm on the brink of our student leaders day and Pre-O-Week Conference (Pre-Season Conference), followed by our huge O Week Mission. Added to this some big family events, a laptop and shower head that need to get fixed, a staff member who twisted their ankle, the launch of a new not-for-profit association (New Front Door: The Church IT Guild), and a few other major fundraising grant proposals: there's a fair bit on!
So how do you wrestle the chaos into control in these kinds of intense seasons that make you feel like you are drowning and kind of going mad, even before they've begun?
Firstly, procrastinate by watching the Winter Olympics, and writing a blog post about it.
Secondly, drink a bit less coffee to manage the anxiety, make sure you breath and walk slowly and read the Bible and pray and sleep and exercise.
Thirdly, in terms of the actual logistics, here is something of my process:
1. Start Planning Early
I'm always fully of bewilderment and pity for those who start planning and working in earnest for the new church/Christian Union year in January… or even in November. We really start planning and working towards these busy seasons 6 months out. Anything that can be done mega-early will bless you later.
2. Out Of Office Reply
I set up an Out Of Office reply on my email, telling people I will be probably slower in responding than I'd like to be. This takes a bit of pressure off my mind, feeling those emails piling up that I'm not getting to… I don't feel crushed by it. I know that they know that there'll be a delay.
3. Cancel the things that can be cancelled
I can't do everything, so I need to figure out what stuff I can, at least temporarily, not do. This is not the time to major on principled consistency. A few weeks won't hurt. So things like regular staff 1:1 meetings, other regular appointments, committees I'm not really needed on. Also, with family, we do our best to look at our schedules and figure out what can give. Thanks to Nikki and the kids for bearing with me!
4. List out the main projects
In some ways the next few steps are just David Allen's Getting Things Done on overdrive… I kind of pluck out of my more global system, a little emergency system for the short term.
So I scan through my paper inbox, email, TODO software (I use Asana) and try to pull out: what are the projects and TODOs that really must get done in this period of time. I list them out, so I can see all the hats I'm wearing:
- New Front Door
- Home Church Welcome Team
- Campus Patrons
- Evangelism Team
- O Week Mission
- Support Raising
There are some small TODOs that also must get done that aren't tied to a project, so I put them in the second list.
5. List out all the TODOs that have to get done
Then I list out all the actions associated to these projects, as well as other floating once-off TODOs that really have to happen between now and the end of the O Week Mission season. Things like
- Cancel Xavier's BeIn Sports subscription
- Announcement email
- Blurbs for sermon series
- Reference check for new staff applicant
- Bookmark Elvanto Forms on iPads
- Reminder for Welcome Team
- Alumni Fundraising Drive email
- Reply to Campus Patrons email
- Reminder for Welcome Team meeting
- Plan O Week contact tables for gaps when staff aren't there
And on and on and on.
6. Write down due dates and estimate time they will take
Then I mark each with when they need to be done by and how long they will take. Some things will only take 15 minutes. Some will take 2 hours…. I rarely estimate in less than a 15 minute increment, because in this way I make space for procrastination and unexpected stuff that will inevitably come in as well.
7. Schedule the week
Then I schedule out all the TODOs into my actual week. And God-willing there's enough space for it. If not, I have to do some last minute delegation, cancelling, culling, simplifying and panicking.
I also work on the basis of where my energy is at its highest, and adopt a schedule, where possible, that can trade off that. In my case, I'm a morning person, so wherever possible I will try to plan for early bed-times and stupidly early wake up times.
In this process, I need to actually figure out where the 'breather' places are. Even in mad crazy seasons you need to plan to stop and breathe and rest and walk in the sunlight. Can I carve out an even slightly slower morning? Or a half hour break one afternoon?
So there you go. Hope that's helpful? What's your system? Anything I've missed out? Help! Please! 🙂
By the way, this is also the kind of process you want to go through with staff who might work for you, who are starting to feel overwhelmed and want to drop things. Rather than simply complying with whatever things they say they must drop… instead this process helps work with them in a more systematic way that you can collaborate and guide a bit more.
Now I have to stop delaying that process by blogging about it… and start DOING it.
- Do we need a video like this for “Am I running a church or parachurch?”
- Churches: support fewer missionaries at a higher amount. It builds relationship and accountability, frees up their time from visiting heaps of churches so they can focus on the work says Mark Dever. Of course this means that the missionary is more vulnerable if you pull your support.
- Mark Dever on the reality of privilege, the sins of past Christians and much more
- Great warning not to assume the only moral vote is a single issue vote… and how the black community has learned that historically. Starts around 15mins
- A good analogy for silly science over-reaching about ethics and religion. If your science says The Beatles are average, maybe you're science if wrong?
- Lots of intriguing stuff from @MarkDever on discipling. Pastors explain people need to work around our schedules sometimes and forgive our unavailability. Look for both hungry and teachable people. Curiously: Dever says paid staff shouldn't do 1:1 during work hours. Rathey they should model it as a part of ordinary Christian life. Also curious: Dever invites people he'd like to disciple to come and 'hang out and read a book in my study' why he's working on a message, so that they can chat during mental breaks.
- “”The Christianity Richard Dawkins objects to is the Christianity a smart 13 year old boy objects to.” Jordan B Peterson
- Abortion doulas: This makes me feel so sad, and sick in my stomach. What a dark strangeness.
- What does the Screwtape Letters have to say about flippant jokes at the expense of rollerblading?
- I use Relax Rain (and just discovered Relax Sea) to sleep on planes and other power nap situations. But then @lookupANDY showed me this. Something soothing about knowing your coworker is killing it next to you on their laptop, so you can zone out.
- How fast do you type? Are you a T Rex, a Tortoise or an Octopus? Quick online test.
- Carl Trueman on the parachurch
- Kevin de Young and Ryan Kelly’s positive case for the parachurch
- Lots of gold in this little workbook on how to lead church leadership teams and committees
Matthias Media sent me a copy of The Tony Payne Collection to review late last year. It was a great Christmas present! I spent the summer break reading it and tweeting some of my favourite bits (http://twitter.com/mikey_g_lynch). It's a great little collection worth getting hold of.
Tony was one of the people who discipled me. Not that we met up and read the Bible or anything like that. I didn't even have a face to face conversation with him until last year. But in addition to those who met with me in person, one of my mothers in the faith, Jo, gave me her backlog of The Briefing—all the way back to the black and white #1 issue—and I binge-read them the way I binge-watched Stranger Things 2 recently. Along with other favourite authors like Don Carson and John Stott, Tony Payne helped form my Christian mind and ministry.
So it's great to have to have a Best Of anthology to put Tony's articles back into circulation. I know The Tony Payne Collection is going on the list of books we give away during the year to students at the University Fellowship of Christians (we give away 2 different books a month to one guy and one girl). It would also be great to dip into to read and discuss with a ministry team or an individual you are training. The articles are varying sizes, on a vast range of topics, so that you can cover a series of great, biblical ideas that suits the occasion.
Personally, I even found it refreshing for me to check back in on some core ideas that matter to me in life and ministry. A reminder about what things I might be in danger of assuming and forgetting to explicitly teach.
The Tony Payne Collection is also a fun historical artefact. Many of the articles are editorial pieces responding to the issues of the day, and even the more 'timeless' pieces bear the marks of particular issues, errors and fads of Australian Christianity in the last 30 years. It was surprising to me how little this large collection of articles manifested some of what I consider to be the fair critiques of the 'conservative camp of the Sydney Anglicans'. Tony wrote positively and openly about emotions, for example; about doing church well even in aesthetic matters; and his critiques of other movements struck me as even-handed. There are of course other criticisms of thef 'conservative camp of the Sydney Anglicans' that I don't consider to be criticisms at all, and this volume probably gives further fuel to those who would be critical. It is interesting to note that the issue of women in ministry is absent, although there are a couple of articlces on manhood.
The one thing that is curious in retrospect is the sheer amount of energy put into clarifying whether or not we should call what we do on Sunday 'worship'. Although I agree with the guts of the argument, the amount of energy that is expended on it stirkes me as a little quaint now.
So grab a copy and buy another one to give to someone else. It really is a great volume!
About Xian Reflections
Xian Reflections is written by Mikey Lynch.
Mikey graduated from the University of Tasmania with a Bachelor of Arts in 2002. In 2000 he became one of the founding leaders of Crossroads Presbyterian Church where he was the lead pastor for 7 years from 2003.
Mikey now works as the Campus Director of the University Fellowship of Christians, University of Tasmania, Hobart. Mikey is the chairman of The Vision 100 Network (Tasmania) and a founding director of Geneva Push (national) – both church planting networks. He is also a chaplain at Jane Franklin Hall and the chairman of New Front Door: the Church IT Guild.